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Title: Embracing the "Love Diet": A Journey of Self-Discovery

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Chapter 1: Understanding the "Love Diet"

Reflecting on the concept of the 90-Day "Love Diet," I find myself grappling with a mix of enthusiasm and apprehension. It’s essential to recognize that every action carries potential drawbacks. The key is to focus on the promising possibilities that lie ahead.

What advantages do I perceive? Importantly, these advantages must be independent of any immediate reactions from Tananarive; the approach cannot be transactional. Instead, we can categorize relationships into three distinct levels:

  1. Seeking personal gain.
  2. Willingness to give when receiving.
  3. Generosity without the expectation of return.

Q: What if my partner does not reciprocate?

A: This experience will teach you something significant about them, likely guiding you toward a decision about the future of the relationship.

Q: What personal gains can I anticipate?

A: Fully opening your heart, even in a limited situation, can yield a series of positive outcomes.

Q: Does this make me susceptible to exploitation?

A: This concern is valid. The solution lies in first activating your survival instincts. If you are certain that you will not only survive but thrive, regardless of others' reactions, you can proceed with confidence.

This last point is crucial. Any anxiety I experience is rooted in fear—fear of loss and harm. The primary fears revolve around survival, reproduction, and social acceptance.

What do I fear losing? Recognizing this fear highlights my own vulnerabilities and my need to take responsibility for my emotions, actions, and outcomes. To genuinely open my heart without reservations, I must trust myself. My self-awareness must evolve beyond ego, understanding that while my ego may be challenged, my soul remains untouched.

In fact, many spiritual teachings advocate that love is the ultimate answer. The prospect of more fully embracing love can be intimidating, particularly if I doubt my own judgment and perception.

One perspective on creativity suggests that the "artist" represents the child within, yearning to remain in a state of flow and play. Conversely, the adult self manages practicalities like finances and contracts. In this context, embracing love requires embodying both the childlike wonder and the wisdom of the elder, acknowledging that love is paramount, and those who dwell in it are truly blessed.

To reside in this childlike, spiritual space, I must shift my focus away from myself in every interaction and direct it toward the beloved. Achieving this requires my survival instincts and warrior spirit to be alive and instinctively competent, ensuring that I feel capable of navigating whatever arises over the next 90 days.

If we consider three pivotal facets of life—Body, Relationships (both inner and outer), and Career (the act of hunting and gathering)—I must ask: IF I ELEVATE MY RELATIONSHIPS, how will it influence my body and career?

The principle of psychological tensegrity suggests a resounding "yes." This means that greater risks can lead to more significant rewards. The fear-driven ego does not represent my truest self, and the excellence I seek will emerge not from ego but from my authentic self, fueled by energy and honed through practice.

Indeed, I must confront and diminish my ego to reach that level, and I see this as a gentle and loving approach. This is the worst-case scenario.

Conversely, the best-case scenario is extraordinary: enhancing the most meaningful relationship of my life. What if I shower Tananarive with increased love, passion, consideration, and support? How might she flourish at a time when the world is ready to embrace her more fully?

Imagine if she reciprocated this energy towards me—what might that mean for our marriage, health, and careers?

The potential outcomes are truly remarkable. I am committed to pursuing this path. We will discuss this further this Saturday on FIREDANCE: THE NEXT LEVEL.

Steven Barnes is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

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