Chapter 1: The Struggle of Surrender

In America, we have a tendency to fight. We battle for our nation, our loved ones, and our beliefs—often just for the sake of conflict. If given the chance, we would even take on the universe itself. Minor disputes can escalate quickly, with people clashing over trivial matters, especially after a few drinks. This combative nature is often seen as a male trait.

However, one approach we seldom consider is surrender. Surrendering is not typically associated with masculinity; instead, we default to fighting. An old Irish proverb humorously captures this sentiment: "Is this a private fight, or can anyone join in?" Yet, there are moments when surrender is the wisest and most compassionate choice, particularly when facing dire circumstances, such as battling cancer.

Many obituaries of those who succumb to cancer include the phrase, "He died after a long battle with stomach cancer." Even in the face of death, the language of conflict persists. Yet, this combative mindset can be detrimental to truly living life.

"Learning how to surrender might save your life someday."

Chapter 2: Jeff Bridges' Wisdom

At 72, Jeff Bridges stands as a towering figure in Hollywood, with seven Academy Award nominations and a win for his role in Crazy Heart. Known for his versatility, Bridges can embody the hero, the villain, or even the laid-back stoner. With a resume boasting sixty films, including the cult classic The Big Lebowski, he has been described by film critic Pauline Kael as "the most natural and least self-conscious screen actor."

However, fame and fortune do not shield one from life’s challenges. During the pandemic, while filming The Old Man, Bridges faced a devastating double blow. He was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, presenting a significant mass in his stomach. Fortunately, chemotherapy showed promising results, and he felt his condition improving—until he contracted COVID-19.

With his immune system compromised, the virus hit him hard, leading to a five-week hospitalization. In his own words, he described the agony of struggling to breathe. His doctors were cautiously optimistic, but they urged him to fight. In contrast, Bridges embraced a different philosophy: "What are you talking about, man? I’m in surrender mode!" He acknowledged the inevitability of death and the shared human experience of illness.

Jeff Bridges, CBS Sunday Morning

In this enlightening statement, Bridges imparts three essential lessons for leading a spiritually fulfilling life:

1. Embrace surrender in the present moment, especially during crises.
2. Cultivate awareness of the here and now.
3. Recognize the Buddhist principle of impermanence: "We’re all gonna die, man."

Bridges’ journey underscores the profound wisdom in surrendering. It may have contributed to his recovery, as he remains vibrant and active in his career today. While surrender played a crucial role in his healing, he did not forgo conventional medical care; instead, he chose to accept the situation rather than fight against it.

Chapter 3: The Meditative Path

In addition to his acting career, Jeff Bridges has long been a practitioner of meditation and Buddhism. A glimpse into his life reveals a dedicated meditator, as noted in a Tricycle Magazine interview from 1961. His meditation setup includes a travel gong and a collection of Buddhist texts, such as Thich Nhat Hanh’s Walking Meditation.

Bridges typically dedicates thirty minutes each day to meditation before heading to the film set, focusing on his breath and thoughts while maintaining a relaxed posture.

The normalization of meditation by public figures like Bridges is refreshing. It inspires many, including fans of The Big Lebowski, to embrace mindfulness practices.

Surrendering to the present moment does not equate to admitting defeat. It is not a conscious decision made through logical reasoning. Instead, surrender occurs naturally when we realize we can no longer exert control over a situation and choose to let go. This could manifest suddenly, as with Bridges’ acceptance of his cancer diagnosis, or it may take years of striving for control until one is finally worn out.

Surrender emerges when we stop clinging to the belief that "This shouldn’t be happening" and allow life to unfold as it will. While it may not be feasible to surrender to every circumstance, it is vital to recognize our limitations in controlling life.

Chapter 4: Embracing Surrender

Surrendering can be cultivated through meditation. Practicing mindfulness for even short intervals can teach us to relax and approach life with a lighter spirit. Through this practice, we can learn to breathe easily and find joy in the present moment.

Rather than viewing life as an ongoing battle, we can adopt a more peaceful perspective. In times of conflict, we can choose to observe rather than engage aggressively. If illness arises, we may be better equipped to handle it with grace.

"Surrender to what is. Say 'yes' to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you."

— Eckhart Tolle

Thanks for reading.

Gary, July 2022

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